My way or the highway!

I have had a hard time lately with my blogging. I actually did write two blogs but they were sort of controversial and/ or ending up being rants and I decided I would be better off dissing them. There has been a lot in the news lately that is note-worthy but I will just have to let them go by the wayside and bide my time for discussing them.

However, that being said, there is a story all over the news that I will enjoy writing about. I'm sure you have all heard about the mom that pulled over to the curb and told her bickering girls to GET OUT. Good news is that the girls (12 and 10 ) are fine, bad news is, Mom spent the night in jail. She is a very well educated, highly regarded lawyer at the top of her game but she is also A MOM.

There is a lot of controversy going on about this on TV. The public are chiming in on this and there are mixed reviews on her actions. Some people are out-raged that a mother would be so cruel and uncaring that she would abandon her children. Some think she should have her children taken away from her and placed in child protective services'care. Some say she is a typical rich female that has no clue as to how to handle her children, some theorize that her kids have probably been with nannies all of their lives and are resented for intruding on her life.

Flip side, some say, "been there, done that!" Quite a few of the news people that are reporting this story and many of the people that are interviewed are saying," Why else would there be t-shirts that say, 'Don't make me stop this car!" or ominous sayings, "Wait until we get home." or a variety of other things that imply that the breaking point is near. I saw a tee shirt one time that was very tastefully done with the message being "Get over it!" Quite a few people on the news actually cringed when they reported this story and said they had reached the point of pulling the car over on more than one occasion but had second thoughts after they pulled over.

We traveled quite often to the beach and other destinations during the summer and most of the time we traveled under threat of abandonment. Doc was not the best traveler in the world and frequently stated his intention of pulling the car over and evicting all the back seat riders. We were aware of his temperament and I tried to keep the peace if at all possible. We had many narrow escapes.

One time Gregg bought a six pack of Big Red and poured all of the contents into a picnic jug that had a spigot on it. He added ice and had 1200 miles of drinks readily available in the back seat.
Things were going well until cruising through Tenn. the odor of Big Red wafted up to the front seat, and we all ,excluding Doc, realized that the spigot had not been fully turned off somewhere along the line and we had a couple of quarts of Big Red on the floor of our Impala. Because of the hump in the middle of the car there was a well like area on each side of the hump. One of the wells was full of B.R. and Gregg was baling it out the window as fast as he could with a small paper cup. Doc did mention once that it smelled like Big Red in the car,but we knew better than to apprise him of whence the odor came. At our next pit stop, he wondered what that was all over the back left fender. Hmmmm. Abandonment avoided on that trip.

We had another incident when Keith and Brian had a shoe box with a toad in it in the back seat and the toad escaped. It leaped all over the car with us frantically trying to capture it but that time we just thought Doc was unaware of it, the toad finally jumped onto his lap, he reached down and picked it up and tossed it out of the car. No war declared that day!

'Mom rage 'struck one time that I worried about for years but the last time I checked, the kids do not remember it. I was the one most traumatized by it. It was on a New Year's day and the kids were particularly fractious that day. It was just one big bicker session. They argued over everything but finally they found a noise maker toy, one that was metal, round with a wooden handle and objects inside the toy that made an annoying noise when the toy was shaken. A battle ensued over possession of the toy, I HAD HAD it. I grabbed the toy out of their hands and threw it on the floor and jumped up and down on it until I had rendered it useless. (my feet hurt for days). I then disposed of the remains and encountered their looks of shock and awe! We had a few relatively quiet hours after that.

You know what? Moms and dads have their limits.

I pulled the car over on I-95 one time and threatened to hitch hike back to Kentucky but rapidly changed my mind when a State Highway Patrolman pulled up and said, "Is everything OK?" Sure,I said and got back into the car and took the next exit off and got on the right road and continued on. Anyone can make a mistake, right?

Bearty and the Beasts

April is the cruelest month. I know that has been said by someone but right off hand I know not who. We've had a little of every thing, weather wise. It has rained softly, stormed furiously, snowed sporadically, thundered noisily, and lightning has streaked across the sky and under my shades into my bed room, but not under my covers! It has been 32 degrees and frosty and 75 degrees and sweaty. (OK by me). I do love weather and like its variations but I am a little tired of being cold and having purple hands.

The flowers are beautiful and the pear trees have shed all of their little white petals across our lawns and now it is time for the dogwoods to show off. The azaleas are ready to compete also and the tulips too. There is so much beauty around us.

The happenings in the world, however; have been ugly, obscene and devastating. A father killing four of his children and himself, a deranged man killing 16 people in a civic center and then himself. (He lived in fear of Obama taking his guns away. ) Three policeman gunned down in California, two ambushed and shot in Indiana, another two or three shot in the north east and another female policewoman shot today. The police are out gunned and the country is shocked by it all. I, for one, am tired of them asking the same question after each incident," Why would someone do that? They must be sick! They must be crazy! How can we anticipate these events and prevent them. "The day before yesterday a man was shot in a strip mall parking lot at 2:30 in the afternoon in the South end of Louisville. Plenty of witnesses observed the crime 'going down' and watched the rented car drive away with the two shooters in it. Drug deal gone bad! Are these guys sick, crazy, could someone anticipate this happening?A letter writer to the editor in today"s paper railed against the anti-gun folks and said, we would all be better off if we were all armed. His theory being that if we were all armed we would be a threat to the others and so they would let us alone and not be so hasty about settling all disputes with gun fire. Now who's crazy? We've got a problem.

There were 50 people killed by six mass murderers just this past week. That doesn't include the single murders that happen every day. I grieve over the young Americans killed each day in Iraq and other war zones but our death toll from gun fire right here in America is worse than the war zone's. Let us pray!

News paper's obits

I truly do like reading the news paper. When I was a child, my dad used to sit at the kitchen table and read the news paper while my mother cooked dinner. He would say, "Listen to this." and then he would proceed to read to us from the paper. We had to be quiet and listen. He read the Op Ed page and then remarked on what he had just read. He would agree or disagree and give reasons why. These comments were often accompanied by vituperative remarks. He read news articles, sports, obituaries and finally the Funnies. He had names for the Comic page personalities and discussed them as if they were real people. He called Detective Dan Dunn, Damn Dumb and had names for Dick Tracey, B.O. Plenty and many others. I was tuned into politics and civic matters and critiquing at a very early age. I don't ever recall him reading to us out of story books or books of poetry, that was Mother's job but he sure kept us up on current events.There were times when I resented having him insist that we listen to everything he chose to read to us. It took me about 30 years to realize that he was educating us and instilling values in his own way. Perhaps unaware that he was doing that.

I am saddened by the fact that so many news papers are closing their doors. Large papers that have been in business for more than a century. Gannett, who I don't really care for, are gradually cutting back and asking their employees to take unpaid weeks off to keep from being laid off. The Courier ,which they own, is so small and getting smaller each day, that it will come as no surprise if they close down. I could only imagine what my dad would have to say about the inch high comic strips that you need magnifiers to read! I complain about the paper, non stop, but I would still rather read the hard copy than read the news on the computer. I read both.

I used to teach my classes about the news paper. I would have the paper in hand and show them each part of the paper and give them the skills to find what information they were seeking. With one class, when it came time in my presentation to teach them where to find the obituaries, one student was shocked! He said, " You mean they have a whole page or two of dead people's names? Why would anyone want to read about dead people?" That led to a lively discussion with the rest of the classmates joining in. We finally convinced him that it was a necessary service.

I enjoy reading the columnists, sometimes it gets me fired up and other days it calms me down. I have my favorites and I have my un-favorites! One of my favorites is Garrison Keillor. A few weeks ago he wrote a eulogy type column about his brother that was particularly poignant.

I never fail to read the obituary page. I wonder how many lies are told about the deceased that no one would dare dispute. " He was loved by everyone and always had a smile and a good word to say." I can hear some of the people reading the obit saying, "Yeah, right!" I love to read the parenthetical names that they publish along with the deceased person's given name. I think my favorite may be (Chilli Dog), or how about (Popcorn),(Chunky), (Mama Cup Cake,) (Slats), (Rat) and many, many more! Be careful what you nick name your child! Those names live on!. In the memorial section, the other day, I read a message that said,"Bro,people still can't keep yo' name out they mouth." Very touching, I thought.

I know the economy has some impact on the newspaper because there are fewer advertisers but I do hope that if and when the recovery comes we can get back to bigger and better news papers. We live here in Louisville because of the impact television had on magazines and advertising, I hope papers don't suffer the same fate.

Even so, after all is said and done I still dislike Gannett and it's progeny, but I would selfishly hate to witness its demise. I still want a paper in my hands! Ciao

Good Samaritan

You are all familiar with the Biblical story of the good Samaritan. In one of the "Parables of Jesus", the only one of the several passersby to help or come to the aid of a Jew who had been robbed, beaten and left to die in a roadside ditch, was a man from Samaria. This admirable act of kindness was particularly note worthy because the Jews and Samaritans were generally enemies. When Jesus urged his followeres to 'love thy neighbor', he was asked, "Who is our neighbor?" He used the parable of the Samaritan and the Jew and forced his questioner to admit that the Samaritan was truly a neighbor of the man who was in the ditch. So people who go out of their way to perform acts of kindness are figuratively considered Good Samaritans.

Having said all of that, I think everyone likes to be considered a Good Samaritan, it makes one feel so noble, sometimes even superior. How rewarding it is to be able to give assistance to someone in need. The person in the checkout lane in front of you that is short a dollar or two and you quickly say, " Here, let me help you out." or the person burdoned down with packages that you offer to help carry. One time I came out of Krogers and it was teeming rain, there was a woman standing in front of the store with a full baskart of groceries and no coat, hat or umbrella. She was trying to get up the courage to go out into the rain to get to her car at the far end of the parking lot. I had an umbrella, so I offered to watch her groceries while she used my umbrella to run to her car. She could then drive up to where I was standing, sheltered, and load her groceries into her trunk and then give me back my umbrella. She was overwhelmed with my random act of kindness and thanked me over and over. I got my reward by the pride I felt for having had the opportunity to help her. Good Samaritan on a tiny, tiny scale but nevertheless it made me feel good.

Lets talk about the other side of the Samaritan acts. Have you ever thought of the' person in the ditch?' How does it feel to be the recipient of the kind act? Especially if you are a pretty strong, self reliant person that has not often been in a position of need. It feels good to be the Samaritan and filled with pride but to be the person in the ditch and be filled with humility and humbleness is a whole different aspect.

Speaking of people in the ditch, one time Brian, Doc and I were out riding our bikes. We were trying to cross Breckenridge Lane at Sudbury. They have a light at that intersection now but did not have one at that time. The speed limit is 40mph on Breckenridge, so it was a very hairy position to be in. We watched closely and finally saw a break in the traffic and went full speed ahead to get across. I was in the lead and Brian behind me and we thought Doc was bringing up the rear. We cruised about a block and a half when suddenly Brian said,"Stop! where is Daddy?" He was not behind us and we could not see the intersection but we turned around and went speeding back to see what had happened. Doc had toe holders, or whatever they are called, on his pedals and his foot got trapped and he could not get his foot out and he fell into the ditch by the side of the road. We neither saw him or heard him when we went forward. It goes without saying that he was infuriated! We quickly helped him out of the toe traps and got him up and on his bike again but believe me he did not thank us as Samaritans! He was sure the whole thing was our fault because we did not look back as we were fleeing. He yelled for about five blocks before he simmered down and would listen to our comments. When we got home he took the toe things off and discarded them and thereafter referred to them as toe traps. He finally admitted that we were not at fault and we all lived to ride another day! Tough to be the guy' in the ditch' and get over the humiliation and be thankful. Ciao

Ramblings

I was wakened up very early this morning. My number is one number different than GE's so I have been getting their calls for years. It doesn't happen often but it is aggravating when it does happen because it is always very early in the morning or in the middle of the night. The calls are from employees calling to say they are not coming in to work. Today's call came at 5:15 AM. The guy was very apologetic but nevertheless, I was awake and could not go back to sleep. I am always tempted to respond to the caller and tell him work has been called off for the rest of the week, or maybe argue with him that he doesn't sound sick to me so come in anyway, or maybe suggest that his job has been eliminated but I'm not really into sick jokes so I just growl and hang up.

I took Fergus to the groomer and therefore, I went through the park and had a chance to see all of the trees in bloom. The tulip poplars, the Bradford Pears, the dogwoods and the forsythia and other flowering trees and bushes. It was raining so there were not as many runners or bikers and only a few golfers at the clubhouse. Tomorrow is the first day of Spring. Halleluia!

It is also time for March Madness. We are all hoping for U of L to win the whole shebang but any body can win in any given game so we will all be on the edge of our seats throughout the whole tournament. Barack Obama went out on a limb on ESPN's "Sports Center" and chose U of L to be in the championship game with UNC but he thinks UNC will win. I hope he is wrong about that but he did mention the fact that U of L is a great team and has a great defence.

We shall see! Ciao

Bumper Sticker World

In today's world people put their philosophic beliefs and their likes and dislikes on their bumpers for all to see. We know what school considers their kid an honor student, what basketball or football team they cheer for, who they are going to vote for, and other various and sundry things. Yesterday, I saw one that said, "If you ain't cheatin' you ain't trying." Another one said, "There's no alternative to being yourself." Now that last one gave me pause for thought. There is so much said about 'finding' yourself. I recall an old class mate of mine writing a note on her Christmas card to me and she was bringing me up to date on the status of all of her children. She said her daughter, Ann, was in California 'trying to find herself'. Peg, her mom, said she couldn't figure out why she would go looking for herself in California when she had never left Springfield, Ohio.

Being yourself is very complex, when you think about it. Which 'self ' are you? A number of years ago when Brian was a young child, I brought home my picture that had been taken at school. Everyone at school had remarked about what a good picture, of me, that it was. When I showed it to Brian he looked at it for a minute, looking very puzzled, and said, "Is this what you look like at school?" "Well, I guess so. Why ? He said, "You look so teachery!" He saw one of my 'selves' in that picture, not the 'Mama self' but the 'teacher self '.

I think we have many 'selves' depending on who we are at any given time. Are you the same 'self ' at work as you are at home? Are we just role playing in all of the different positions in our lives? I have many roles, who I am, when I am alone with myself,or being a mother, grandmother, great-grandmother, teacher, neighbor, customer, patient, citizen, traveler, it goes on and on. I am a different self in all of these roles. I have not totally settled into being a widow. That is a new role for me, I knew how to be a spouse but I have not yet settled into the 'self' that I am required to be now. Maybe I should go to France or Indonesia or somewhere to see if I can find my "widow self ." I guess you need to be yourself depending on who you are at the moment. I know that your basic characteristics define who you are but I have known people that can be harsh and unrelenting in some instances and can be soft and loving in others, which one is the real self? Its beyond me! What would an alternative be to being yourself?

So,pondering the imponderables...I guess I'll just go on being myself... whoever that may be!
Betty Charters, Elizabeth Charters, Betty Fitzgerald, Mrs. James Fitzgerald, Grandma Fitzgerald, Great- Memaw Fitzgerald, Aunt Betty, Miz Fitz, Mrs. Um, Hey you, Just plain Betty or best of all Mama. Ciao

Fly the Friendly Skies

In 1997 Linda and I traveled to Ireland, Scotland, England, and Wales. We were with a group of people, college kids, old folks, young folks and a group from Louisiana, some middle schoolers in the Louisiana group and a few teachers and a professor. So we had women, both young and old, men, again, both young and old and kids aged 14 and older. A very mixed group and it was so much fun and very enlightening.

As we traveled through the various countries we were impressed with the difference in the cultures of the people. The Irish were super friendly and so, so funny! They were anxious to please us and went out of their way to be accommodating, We loved them and the scenery, the pubs the churches and of course the sheep. There are five sheep for every citizen in Ireland! Sheeps rule! The people of Wales were quite friendly also, but not quite as colorful as the Irish. The Scotish people were delightful, we visited famous battle fields, the Queen's summer home, beautiful cathedrals, a minute wedding chapel called St. Margaret's that would only seat about 50 guests, and beautiful fields of gorse, heather and poppys. England was so wonderful but the people are rather staid and serious. Shakespear's home, the beautiful cathedrals, the avant garde of Soho, the ambiance of Chester, (my favorite place) with Bobbies and the Hadrian Wall and the pomp and circumstance of the changing of the guard at Buckingham Palace all so enthralling.

BUT the countries all had one thing in common that we found to be rather daunting! Each country had a good supply of public restrooms, that they call toilets, and they all had coin operated doors to enter these necessary rest stops! Our very diverse group resented this abomination! Particularly the young among us, and I must admit, I found it to be a little over the top too. Now, you all know that a group of Americans are not going to take this 'sitting down'. They simply put their coin in and then held the door open for their companions to have access to the facility! However, they spent a lot of time looking for relief stops that did not require a coin. They dubbed the coin operated 'toilets' Pay to Pee stops. Europe was not yet using Euros and it cost one to five pence to pee. So aliteration prevailed. In loud voices the teenagers would anounce, " Five pence to Pay to Pee here!" Outrageous!

Well, all of this is leading up to the news last Friday or Saturday that the Irish and British have decided to install coin operated 'toilets' on their airplanes!! I was so upset about the fact that our airlines were no longer serving peanuts and then lately have decided to charge for luggage, pillows, blankets and soft drinks that I expected great protests from the frequent flier but now, will out airlines have the nerve to ask us to Pay to Pee on airplanes?

May I suggest a couple of things? One , emmulating the astronaut that traveled cross country in her car to persue another woman's husband and wore diapers to cut down on the time spent traveling, or fly Southwest! No diapers needed! Yet. Ciao