Thanksgiving Memories

There is an article in today's paper about Thanksgiving dinners and the dynamics of the family get together. They even had a list of subjects to avoid, seating arrangements, a list of possible reactions to certain member's outbursts, suggestions for limited alcohol consumption all good advise. Rather interesting, that the writers felt a need for guide lines.

My memories of Thanksgiving go back a long way. During FDR's regime the date for Thanksgiving Day was changed to the fourth Thursday of November. It used to be a week earlier.

We always went to London, O for Thanksgiving because that's where all of our relatives lived. My grandparents lived back to back. Mother's parents lived on Fourth St. and Dad's lived on Fifth St. When I was very young we used to take the train to London and then walk from the depot to Grandma Morrissey"s house. We didn't have a car until I was in the 6th grade. Dad worked for the Big Four Railroad so we had free passes and used them almost every Sunday and on all holidays to travel to London.

Back in the day, it was not uncommon in big Irish families to have a few unmarried uncles and aunts. They were included in the family get together, of course. So at Grandma Morrissey's two of my mother's sisters Agnes and Catherine (who still lived at home) were present and my grandma's two brothers Uncle Ben and Uncle Tom, who lived on the family farm with another brother's family, were present. Our immediately family consisted of my mother, dad, Joseph, Martha, Paul and me. Grandma and Grandpa made twelve. My two brothers, my sister and I were the only grandchildren despite the fact that my grandparents had ten children.

My Great Uncle Ben raised turkeys on his portion of the farmland so he always provided the turkey for dinner. Great Uncle Tom provided the bourbon for the before dinner highball. We children did not partake of that ritual. Nor did we get to sit at the big table. We sat at a side table in the dining room so we were privy to all the conversations etc. but children were seen and not heard at that period in history. "Speak when you are spoken to." Okay.

The table was laden with turkey and all of the trimmings. Most of the vegetables were grown on the surrounding farms, the fruit for the jellies and jams, the pickles and relishes were all made by Grandma, the oysters were purchased from a store that had them in large crocks and measured them out by the quart or pint as you wished. The desserts were all home made and all delicious. The setting was very formal and the conversations were interesting and low key and there was a warm feeling of conviviality and love.

We spent a big portion of our time at my Grandma Charters' house too. My dad's unmarried sister,Mary Louise still lived at home and two of his brothers, Adrian and Coe were still unmarried and both had jobs that required them to travel. They were always home for the holidays though. Things were very different at that house. Grandma roasted a turkey, made dressing and side dishes and it was left on the stove and you could serve yourself. The oysters were not in a casserole they were raw, served with crackers and again you helped your self. Mary Louise was the baby of the six Charters children and Coe and Adrian were much younger than dad too. They were free spirits. There was a lot of laughter, teasing and fun along with a lot of disapproving looks from Grandma but the beat went on. Grandpa loved it, he sat back and watched all the activity. Dad joined in with his two fun loving brothers and of course we children were included in the high old times. Mother visited for awhile and then went back to be with her family. The bourbon was not limited to the before dinner highball. The convivality and love was there also, just presented at a different level.

I cherish the memories of both family celebrations and know the important lesson that I took away from my youth. Family is the most important aspect of life. We are all different and have different ideas and different personalities but bottom line is: WE ARE FAMILY. Be thankful!

HAPPY THANKSGIVING !!